Friday, February 28, 2014

Squeezing that much awesome into one photo is dangerous to stupidity. #x

Squeezing that much awesome into one photo is dangerous to stupidity. #x

Remember when they first announced the name of the iPad? Isn't this what you were thinking too? #w

Remember when they first announced the name of the iPad? Isn't this what you were thinking too? #w

Status:

Are you as tired as I am of rightwing people defending themselves by saying they're harmless, wouldn't intentionally hurt a fly, love animals, love people, not racist, not against anybody..... but just need to vote for people/legislation that harms the fucking out of all those things? I sure am. #s

I think we ALL want one of these now.

I think we ALL want one of these now.

I love Graham Norton. #w #b

I love Graham Norton. #w #b

Conn. man arrested for having friend film him having sex with a cow while covered in jelly

A Connecticut school tech worker was arrested for allegedly having a friend film him having sex with a cow while covered in jelly, WTNH-TV reported on Tuesday.

Seriously. This happened. Oh fuck you, internet. I'm going to bed after reading that headline, and I'm going to need therapy now.

Thursday, February 27, 2014

Yeah, you can always depend on FuktNooz for stupidity and stupid people. -- from TruthSlam! http://ift.tt/1eDE29T #b #s

Yeah, you can always depend on FuktNooz for stupidity and stupid people. -- from TruthSlam! http://ift.tt/1eDE29T #b #s

His name is Ron Funches

His name is Ron Funches, and he’s an adorable chubby comedian bear who had quite the reaction to this game where he was shown another Ok Cupid bear on @Midnight. Quite an interesting thing to see… @midnight Get More: Comedy Central,Funny Videos,Funny TV Shows

Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Tuesday, February 25, 2014

More love to the Rude Pundit: Your State Sucks: Arizona Sucks Because Its GOP Legislators Are Worms Last week, the Senate in the state of Arizona (motto: "No, Breaking Bad took place in New Mexico") passed SB 1062, the so-called "Religious Freedom Restoration Act." Essentially, SB 1062, along with House Bill 2153, protects "businesses, corporations and people from lawsuits after denying services based on a sincere religious belief." It is an amended version of already existing statutes. Now, everyone knows that the bill exists solely because the Arizona legislature fears that queers getting married are going to want things like "cake" and "decorations" and "hall rentals" and "hotel rooms in which they can fuck all queerly and shit." And if you think the queers are icky and make Jesus cry blood tears, you shouldn't have to deal with 'em. Of course, the way the bill is worded, it might have some unintended consequences. For instance, the ugly city of Phoenix has seen its Muslim population grow exponentially in the last few years. It has become a place for refugees from Muslim countries to settle. Let's say, and, really, why the fuck not, that Phoenix gets a critical mass of Muslim inhabitants. SB 1062 would allow them to say to you (assuming you are female) that you need to cover your whore head with a veil or no cake for you. And if you're getting married Christian? Well, fuck your right to rent the local Holiday Inn owned by a Muslim businessman. His religious freedom was restored, too, motherfuckers. Since the bill's passage, along party lines in the Senate, 17-13, lots of people in Arizona have been encouraging Governor Jan "This Finger Wags at You" Brewer to veto it, including the two Senators in DC from the barren wasteland state, Jeff Flake and John McCain. The Arizona Republic newspaper said the same thing, as have three of the state senators who voted for the bill just last week... Wait...what the hell? Yeah, see, 'cause there's no worm like a sun-baked desert worm, three of the Republican senators who just last Wednesday proudly cast a vote for legalized discrimination wearing the ghoul mask of religious "freedom" have sent a letter to Brewer asking her to veto the thing. Over the weekend, they must have heard an earful because they said that "the reaction from constituents to the business community reinforced their discomfort with their 'yes' votes." This is comedy. You want farce? One of the new fag-loving trio is Rep. Bob Worsley. He is a sponsor of the bill that he now wants vetoed. "We feel it was a solution in search of a problem," he said, not noting that he was the one searching. And in the letter, he added that he and the others "condemn discrimination." It sounds like someone learned the "definitions" of "words" like "freedom" and "discrimination."Why the change of heart? Maybe because businesses in Arizona, the ones who would have their precious, easily-shattered religious freedom so heinously abrogated by sinning gays tying the knot, have come out against the bill. It would not be overstating it to say that many business groups and leaders are shitting themselves at the prospect of the state that lost a Super Bowl and a fuckton of cash because it hates immigrants moving on to hating LGBT people. Finally, now that open gays and lesbians have money to spend, it's welcoming arms. The only thing more American than Jesus is money.

More love to the Rude Pundit: Your State Sucks: Arizona Sucks Because Its GOP Legislators Are Worms Last week, the Senate in the state of Arizona (motto: "No, Breaking Bad took place in New Mexico") passed SB 1062, the so-called "Religious Freedom Restoration Act." Essentially, SB 1062, along with House Bill 2153, protects "businesses, corporations and people from lawsuits after denying services based on a sincere religious belief." It is an amended version of already existing statutes. Now, everyone knows that the bill exists solely because the Arizona legislature fears that queers getting married are going to want things like "cake" and "decorations" and "hall rentals" and "hotel rooms in which they can fuck all queerly and shit." And if you think the queers are icky and make Jesus cry blood tears, you shouldn't have to deal with 'em. Of course, the way the bill is worded, it might have some unintended consequences. For instance, the ugly city of Phoenix has seen its Muslim population grow exponentially in the last few years. It has become a place for refugees from Muslim countries to settle. Let's say, and, really, why the fuck not, that Phoenix gets a critical mass of Muslim inhabitants. SB 1062 would allow them to say to you (assuming you are female) that you need to cover your whore head with a veil or no cake for you. And if you're getting married Christian? Well, fuck your right to rent the local Holiday Inn owned by a Muslim businessman. His religious freedom was restored, too, motherfuckers. Since the bill's passage, along party lines in the Senate, 17-13, lots of people in Arizona have been encouraging Governor Jan "This Finger Wags at You" Brewer to veto it, including the two Senators in DC from the barren wasteland state, Jeff Flake and John McCain. The Arizona Republic newspaper said the same thing, as have three of the state senators who voted for the bill just last week... Wait...what the hell? Yeah, see, 'cause there's no worm like a sun-baked desert worm, three of the Republican senators who just last Wednesday proudly cast a vote for legalized discrimination wearing the ghoul mask of religious "freedom" have sent a letter to Brewer asking her to veto the thing. Over the weekend, they must have heard an earful because they said that "the reaction from constituents to the business community reinforced their discomfort with their 'yes' votes." This is comedy. You want farce? One of the new fag-loving trio is Rep. Bob Worsley. He is a sponsor of the bill that he now wants vetoed. "We feel it was a solution in search of a problem," he said, not noting that he was the one searching. And in the letter, he added that he and the others "condemn discrimination." It sounds like someone learned the "definitions" of "words" like "freedom" and "discrimination."Why the change of heart? Maybe because businesses in Arizona, the ones who would have their precious, easily-shattered religious freedom so heinously abrogated by sinning gays tying the knot, have come out against the bill. It would not be overstating it to say that many business groups and leaders are shitting themselves at the prospect of the state that lost a Super Bowl and a fuckton of cash because it hates immigrants moving on to hating LGBT people. Finally, now that open gays and lesbians have money to spend, it's welcoming arms. The only thing more American than Jesus is money.

Monday, February 24, 2014

The floodgates of senseless preaching

Someone almost dies. They are happy to have survived. And people rush in to tell them what God did, as though they know anything about the mind of a may-or-may-not-exist entity.

Please stop doing this people. This is an extremely painful, powerful, scary moment of a person's life, and they don't need you thrusting beliefs about God onto them. You think it's pretty, but what you're saying to someone about God has implications that suck, even if you only think about it for a second.

"God spared you because your time isn't up." Great, now I gotta do what to make that bitch happy? You can't give thanks to the people who saved my life? The person who was with me died, so what, God didn't like him as much?

See? It's not a time for you to start lying through your teeth about shit. It's time to be a listener. It's time to give love. It's time for you to keep your stupid shit to yourself.

And why do I say this? Because what should've been a post of thankfulness and gratitude became a bunch of idiots sullying it up with stupidity when the atheist who had the incident didn't need that shit tossed onto himself. Or when someone loses someone, they don't need you telling them about God. They need you to quit your preaching and be a friend, not a proselytizer.

In the words of Job, whose friend wouldn't stop preaching God shit to him when he was suffering, I say to you: "If only you would be altogether silent! For you, that would be wisdom." Job 13:5

Kelly Mantle and the new contestants

RuPaul's Drag Race new contestant, Kelly Mantle, is a gorgeous Christine Baranski look-alike, ain't she though? It also has some serious talent in Laganja Estranja. She is one of those who you can tell looks at a challenge and smiles at the craziness of it rather than freaks out in fear, and that's going to make her hard to follow. But next week we're gonna meet Milk (friend of Alaska's, as it turns out) and Miss Darienne Lake, who proves that Chris Farley is alive and well and in drag. Can't wait for that. Anyone else loving Vivacious?

NO EXCUSES REMAIN, RIGHTWING



NO EXCUSES REMAIN: A well paid people make for a healthier economy, and companies that pay their employees better with benefits are proving to profit better and maintain prices as low or better. Therefore, no excuse for low wages. A country that treats its prisoners well has shown to have fewer repeat offenders, leaving us with no excuse for mistreating people just to feel better about an illusion of justice. Imprisoning people for marijuana only profited prison owners, but nobody else. Legalization is making those states who've done so profite hugely on taxation, with no crime raise, no addiction increase, no problems whatsoever, as has been seen with all drugs in several countries, leaving us with no further excuse for making drugs illegal. States that have legalized marriage equality have not been destroyed by an angry god, nor has traditional marriage deteriorated, but have find a boom in industry for marriage, leaving us with no excuse to push one religion's idea of marriage onto the rest of the country that is supposed to have church/state separation. There is no excuse remaining for us to keep mistreating people and enforcing hateful, segregating ideas. None. We should know better. Why don't we? Raise the minimum wage, pay employees, tax the rich, legalize drugs, and stop supporting hateful people who speak evil just because you think it's the Jesus-fearin' American thing to do. It's over. You're on the wrong side of all of history, and history keeps proving this. Why keep standing there? #x

Seriously, you get more people bitching over stupid shit than you do actual reasons to laugh.



Seriously, you get more people bitching over stupid shit than you do actual reasons to laugh.

Oooh no they DIDN'T! #b



Oooh no they DIDN'T! #b

Saturday, February 22, 2014

Problem with the world shown in two Tickld posts.



Problem with the world shown in two Tickld posts. Thousands care about Kardashians but people hate political points because they’re just not fun. Apathy kills democracy, as do bread and circuses. -- from TruthSlam! http://ift.tt/1froKtq #b #s

Sadly, it’s true. #2



Sadly, it’s true. #2

Seriously, how is it always a slippery slope to bring justice, but never when it brings the injustice they want? #2



Seriously, how is it always a slippery slope to bring justice, but never when it brings the injustice they want? #2



Thursday, February 20, 2014

Seriously. Remember when television had stories worth watching? #b



Seriously. Remember when television had stories worth watching? #b

Let's Translate Republicanese!



#s #b



All aboard the talking point train! Please keep your mind inside the train at all times, for if you let your own thoughts out you might get hurt by reality. -- from TruthSlam! http://ift.tt/OfF9HR #b #s



All aboard the talking point train! Please keep your mind inside the train at all times, for if you let your own thoughts out you might get hurt by reality. -- from TruthSlam! http://ift.tt/OfF9HR #b #s

How to Become an Atheist in 3 Easy steps!



They'd swerve this reasoning easily though. Their reason, they'd say, for #1 is that that other god isn't the real god of the bible, and therefore #3 won't work because theirs is. But it's a nice try. Sigh... is it sad that I've dealt with them so much that they've become that predictable to me? #b

Baby got self-respect!



Baby got self-respect!

Tuesday, February 18, 2014



Creative, but no. The myth about exemptions for Muslims and Congress is bullshit: http://goo.gl/4BdSjS -- from TruthSlam! http://ift.tt/1e5oFH9



Creative, but no. The myth about exemptions for Muslims and Congress is bullshit: http://goo.gl/4BdSjS -- from TruthSlam! http://ift.tt/1e5oFH9

Anne Rice stood up and congratulated Ellen Page. Then the hate rolled in.



Anne Rice stood up and congratulated Ellen Page. Then the hate rolled in. So she took a stand against hate and silenced the voices of it, and for that I applaud her. But of course now the voices of whiny-victim cries roll in, and they are being dealt with exactly as they should, with zero respect, and with factual reasoning as to why they are wrong. And for that, I also applaud. -- from TruthSlam! http://ift.tt/O5X1oy

Tea Partier...



1. Yeah right. 2. They would if they could, actually. 3. Yeah, that's accurate. 4. Also accurate. 5. Again, would if they simply applied themselves. 6. Total, absolute, complete, 100% truth, except they lately came out against FoxNews for being too liberal. Replace O'Reilly with Glenn Beck, and you're on.

-- from Bible Studies from an Asshole http://ift.tt/15MtkJT



-- from Bible Studies from an Asshole http://ift.tt/15MtkJT

Monday, February 17, 2014

Pop Quiz for those who say both sides are the same...

1) Name a Democratic congressperson who said a rape kit is the same thing as an abortion.
2) Name a Democratic congressperson who wants to give fetuses guns and brought Ted Nugent to a State of the Union address.
3) Name a Democratic congressperson who looked at the President of the United States and said “I cannot even stand to look at you.”
4) Name a Democratic senator who believes Muslim Americans never help fight terrorism.
5) Name a Republican politician or pundit who publicly decried the actions of David Vitter (diapers and hookers), John Ensign (bribery, adultery) and/or Mark Sanford (Appalachian Trail hike that led to Argentina).
6) Name a Republican politician who slapped the hand of Bryan Fischer after Fischer said all gay men are Nazis.
7) Name a Republican politician who told Glenn Beck to shut up after he called Senator Mary Landrieu a “prostitute.”
8) Name a Democratic politician who has said we are in the “End Times.”
9) Name a Republican politician who believes in evolution, and says so publicly.
10) Name a Democratic presidential candidate who ever said the Separation of Church and State makes him “want to throw up.”

Google Admits Google+ Was Just A Ploy To Track Your Behavior Online

As a social network, Google+ is just a bunch of empty circles spinning in a barren wasteland. But Google could give a fuck if consumers prefer Facebook. What the $400 billion data vacuum really wanted, reports The New York Times, is to track everything you do online and sell that personal informatio...

http://ift.tt/1cRlyTq



------------------------------------



Google+ started huge, promised to eventually open its API, and then like all its best projects, just sort of felt like it abandoned all attempts to improve the Plus. What I don't get is how much people feel Plus is useful for promotion. They must be paying huge for that privilege, because so far the only way to use pages is by a small handful of pay services. If Google truly wanted this level of power, as this article claims, they'd have busted their API wide open already for all to use for free. Personally even those handful of services supposedly with access to the API are all useless. I've found Blogger, which promised to auto-post your articles, has yet to even do so once for me. Hootsuite didn't do jack shit. Buffer posts only a few characters (a tweet, let's just say) to pages only and not to personal accounts, which makes that useless. Don't get me started on Wordpress's promise to post to G+ because again, I've yet to see that work even one single time. Every attempt I've made has fizzled. I'm finding G+ useless for blog promotion in every single way so that I've completely given up on it all together. If they are selling us out, as the article says, you'd think they'd do a better job of it. But also, every social media site sells us out. It acts like it's an evil, unique thing to G+, although then admits it's doing a better job than Facebook (and I can't help but think that's bullshit). Personally, I'd rather be sold out to Microsoft. I'd love a Microsoft version of Faceplusbookwhatever. After all, if money is to be funneled this enormously to someone, might as well be to a wealthy-as-hell liberal who does good with his money, than these other people.

Just curious to see if anybody gets this. And if so... whom?



Just curious to see if anybody gets this. And if so... whom?

Cue Rajesh Koothrapali saying, "Ahem... you stole my jam, byotch."



Cue Rajesh Koothrapali saying, "Ahem... you stole my jam, byotch."

Thursday, February 13, 2014


I loathe your kidneys!

"I hate your guts!" someone says if they don't like you. It's a common thing to say. It just pops out without thinking. Here's my question: have you ever loved someone's guts? And why would you? What do guts have to do with love or hate anyway? If I was truly infatuated with someone to the point that I'd want anything to do with their guts, I think that it'd end up in a retraining order, because that's some heavy Hannibal Lecter shit right there..

Are you as tired of "patriot" meaning "moron" as I am?



Are you as tired of "patriot" meaning "moron" as I am?

Asking an Indian didn't have the effect Republicans and Libertarians wanted it to have.



Asking an Indian didn't have the effect Republicans and Libertarians wanted it to have.

ANN COULTER: "My Adam's Apple throbs for you!"



ANN COULTER: "My Adam's Apple throbs for you!"

To boldly go into a relationship no man has ever gone before... nerds!



To boldly go into a relationship no man has ever gone before... nerds!