Thursday, July 17, 2014

July 17, 2014 at 02:35PM

My Own Eyes (in the style of Foo Fighters) Yup, a "Weird Al" pseudo-parody in that it doesn't directly parody a song but it does parody a style. [Intro] I saw a baby drive a truck I saw a junkie eat a tuba I saw a stripper kiss a duck Behind a dumpster in Aruba [Verse 1] I saw this fat, psychotic guy His underwear was made of crickets He pawned a skeleton to buy Some old expired lotto tickets [Pre-Chorus 1] I saw a naked vagrant giving Mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to his cat I probably could have gone my whole life Without seeing that [Chorus] With My Own Eyes I see things that'd drive a normal man insane Wish I could disconnect my brain From My Own Eyes [Verse 2] I saw a mime get hacked to death With an imaginary cleaver I saw an old man's final breath I watched him die from Bieber Fever I saw these diabetic chicks In an abandoned 7-Eleven I watched them snorting pixie sticks While they were belching Stairway To Heaven [Pre-Chorus 2] I saw two drag queens trying to see how many crackers They could shove up each other's nose I'd like to erase my mind completely but I suppose That's just the way it goes [Chorus 2] With My Own Eyes I see things that'd drive a normal man insane Wish I could disconnect my brain From My Own Eyes (My Own Eyes) Those visions haunt my memory Oh, there's so much I wish I could unsee With My Own Eyes [Verse 3] Some priest got drunk and stole a circus zebra And he trained it to massage his back My guinea pig committed hara-kiri So we used him to play hacky-sack My neighbor's kids sold weapons-grade plutonium And frosty ice-cold lemonade They took MasterCard and sometimes Human organs in trade, that's how we paid I have to say that it was really darn good lemonade [Outro] With My Own Eyes I've seen thing that'd drive a normal man insane Wish I could disconnect my brain From My Own Eyes (My Own Eyes) Those visions haunt my memory Oh, there's so much I wish I could unsee With My Own Eyes [repeating]